edge
noun
- 1.a place or part farthest away from the center of something.
- 2.the sharpened side of the blade of a cutting implement or weapon.
verb
- 1.move gradually, carefully, or furtively in a particular direction.These are the official meanings of the word "edge". (from the internet).In my life, living on the edge means pursuing things that seem strange or meaningless to someone peering into my life.Taking up figure skating has pushed me to the edge of what I believe. It rises up in the face of all that I had embraced about life and challenges me to think in new ways.The elephant diet (blog theme for 2013) challenged me to answer the question...."who do you think you are?". As I was able to unpack that question and begin to answer it, a more confident Frances has emerged. Joyful, happy, content, confident....the new me.This year, I can already tell the question is different....."what on earth are you thinking girl?".I'm 47 and I'm putting on a new pair of skates and learning how to figure skate. Oh yes, I thought I knew how to ice skate, and the truth is, I could get around the ice on my skates. But figure skate? THAT is another story altogether. I have a deep respect for the sport as I learn the intricacies of what really happens on the ice.In my head, I can hear voices telling me things like: "this is ridiculous and luxurious and you should be ashamed of yourself for taking the time and resources to do this. God would never want you to pursue something like this, it's a waste of time. He doesn't want you to enjoy life, it should be all serious and heavy."Since it is my desire to inspire you through what I write in this blog, I am committed to honesty and vulnerability.It has rearranged my home life - I no longer make breakfast for my husband and sit with him for a while in the morning before we head into our day. I leave by 5:15 a.m. so all I can do for him is make a pot of coffee and set out the cold cereal for him to eat. I am a very lucky girl, because he is my biggest encourager as I step out onto the edge and do what calls to me from within. Living on the edge affects those we love. It's scary here. But I can already tell that something big is unfolding in my soul.I hope that you will choose to head toward something momentous. When you do, there will be one prevailing question you will have to address. It is my observation that the more doubt and fear you have about it, the stronger the indicator that you are heading toward the edge (in a good way).I'd love to hear from you if you have an edge you think you have identified! What is it? I'd love to encourage you as you step out on the edge.
The first definition is "a place or part farthest away from the center of something." My center has always been ballet. I've been noticing more and more that this center has been taking me from what is important because I put it before everything else. Before school, before my family, sometimes even before God. It's really, really scary to think of life without ballet, which has always been my rock. But it isn't stable, and I think I need to step away, even if it's just for a while. I see you rearranging your life to live on the edge, and you inspire me! If you can do it, Frances, I think I can too.
ReplyDeleteEllen,
DeleteIt is exciting to see things stirring in your heart. Make your decisions carefully. Take your time. I truly believe God is leading you. Nothing is ever wasted and even if you take a break, He will use your experience and gifts in some way down the road. It is such an honor to know you and watch things unfold in your life.