My Favorite Flannel Shirt

Isn't it funny how you remember certain pieces of clothing so clearly? Like in this poem I wrote for my father, the year following his death (over 18 years ago). I normally don't write poems, but for some reason I wrote a few in my journal that year. It was a therapeutic way of processing my grief in that season.

I woke up early this morning thinking about him, Henry Orville Heisey, because today would be his 90th birthday. I pulled out a journal containing some of those post-death poems and decided to share one with you in honor of him. The songwriter in me wants to do a "re-write", but then it wouldn't be in its original form. The day I wrote it I had simply picked up my pen and started writing until I felt like stopping.

My Favorite Shirt

It hangs on the line

my favorite shirt

colors of blue, green and pink

that brought you to life

I wear it often

and snuggle it tight

a small piece of my daddy

I feel like I wear

The blue, cream and gray

of a sweater you wore—

I think now it's Aspen's

I can't be real sure

It made you look healthy

stroked the blue in your eyes

even though your custom

was to wear a tieless shirt underneath

The ugly gray suit

you used to wear

seemed to have been your favorite

though for it, no one else cared

It made you look sickly

the color was drained

but it makes me smile

to remember you in it  

The night of the viewing

I wasn't prepared

to see you look different

in the casket lying there

Everyone else always looks so nice

until it's YOUR daddy

looking cold, dead and still

I think you would have been pretty

if instead you could wear

the pastel colored flannel—

my favorite shirt

But then I couldn't wear it

that soft, warm cover

and I guess it doesn't matter

because I can't even remember

what it was that you did have on

But whether or not

you were dressed in this or that

one thing is for sure

my daddy's in there

for it's not the outside

that I remember best

but what's on the inside

that will never lay to rest

White coat—in those days, he was a chemistry professor.

Black coat—Father of the bride.

My brother, Adriel, taking a picture of my parents. Love that plaid shirt, Daddy!

Ah yes...that navy blue suit (without a tie).

This was after the concert I did to raise funds for my very first CD—Under the Big Blue Sky.
My father gave me the money to have nice invitations made so I could invite my friends.
No one knew I was writing music in those days, so that concert was a big step for me.

I love you Daddy.